Craig Has A Cool List

In honor to two recent sales via Craigslist, here are two letters to the sold items.

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Dear Foosball Table:
It was with great joy that we loaded you into that van tonight, even though it took too many emails and that chatty woman showed up without an appointment. I'm glad that I will never have to lift your heavy butt again. I'm glad that we have more space in our garage. The worst thing about you was that you were so noisy. The best thing about you was that you had four drink holders.
Fondly,
Sam

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Dear Nick's Blue Guitar:
Wow - you were a popular listing, eh? A lot of people wrote to check you out. I'm still kinda shocked that the woman who bought you asked me to drive 25 miles to meet her "at the I-5." It sounded kinda fishy/terrifying, so I said no. She drove to our house, and when her unattractive son saw you, he couldn't resist. The best thing about you is that when you were new you only cost $60, and Nick sold you for $40. You didn't have any drink holders, but that was OK.
Fondly,
Sam