THOUGHTS AND MUSINGS HONORING SURFACEY CONVERSATIONS, FAMILY, AND THE EXCRUCIATING MINUTIAE OF EVERYDAY LIFE

Tuesday, December 05, 2006

Naughty Or Nice?

This seems to be a season of notable conversations. Here's another.
(The dashes represent the overlappedness of the exchange.)

CAST OF CHARACTERS
E = employee (50-ish-year-old female)
S = me

LOCATION
I am at the Forest Grove Bi-Mart check-out area, wanting to pay for holiday candy and other stocking-ish items.
In case you don't know, Bi-Mart is a cheap department-ish store in need of a thorough cleaning.

* * * * * * * * * *

E: Looks like someone is getting done with buying all those little things for Christmas.

S: Yep, that would be me. It's nice to have it done.

E: So, do you have someone to take care of you and, umh - your stocking?

S: Uh, yeah.

E: Will you get a nice present? Have you been nice - or naughty?

S: I don't really know - I've been OK, I guess.

E: Well, I've been kinda naughty -

S: -oh, well, umm-

E: -and at times, I've been downright bad-

S: -so, the debit card machine-

E: -y'know and I was wondering if maybe-

S: -has a message here that it's-

E: -you were naughty, too.

S: -waiting for you to do something, so I can leave.

* * * * * * * * * *
To answer your questions:
* No, she wasn't on drugs (not a Grover Meth-ie), though she must have been quite desperate.
* No, I will not be shopping at Bi-Mart again.
* No, it wasn't Tammy.

7 Comments:

Blogger Ashley said...

man, i really thought it was the t-meister!!! so disappointed. you're like a freak of nature, we buy those things on christmas eve. okay, so maybe we're the dumbasses. touche.

12/05/2006 10:41 PM

 
Blogger truax said...

At least you got that out of the way so you don't have to think about it anymore. And don't let one ho destroy all of your strong, wonderful, joyous feelings toward Bi-Mart.

Got to admit...it sounded a lot like a Tammy citing.

12/06/2006 8:27 AM

 
Blogger haylie said...

Wow. No pickup like the Bi-mart pickup.

12/06/2006 8:35 AM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Eewww. She really put the 'ho' in ho-ho-ho...

12/06/2006 9:38 AM

 
Blogger T-Mac said...

That's hot. :-)

12/06/2006 11:12 PM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I don't even know what to do with that. However, I like that you stood your ground and make it even more awkward.

12/06/2006 11:15 PM

 
Blogger Nick (ace2) said...

that`s really funny dad

12/07/2006 3:17 PM

 

Post a Comment

<< Home